Pictures

Chronology of Pictures from the Recent Past Till Today

Hawaii, 2002 

Hawaii, 2002

Wedding

Wedding 2005

Hawaii, 2007

Hawaii, 2007

World Series 2007
World Series 2007 Game 4: Red Sox Win!

Headshot
Pre-FFS, November 19, 2007

Headshot Straight On

Pre-FFS, November 19, 2007 

Pre Profile 

Pre-FFS, November 19, 2007
—————————————–

1d Postop – November 30, 2007

Postop 24 

——————————-

36h Postop – November 30, 2007

Postop 36

—————————————-

3d Postop – December 2, 2007 (Morning)

 Surgery Post 3 Days

 ————————————-

3.5d Postop – December 2, 2007

3 Plus Days Postop

Ok, Now we are starting to get somewhere, this is 3.5 Days Post-Op, the swelling is down quite a bit, and my hair has been washed. 

—————————————–

Random Picture of the Purse Tan Got Me :)

 Purse

There was a request for a picture of the purse Tan gave me. Thanks Tan!

——————————————

3.5d Postop – December 3, 2007

 Third Day - Midday

About 8 hours after the last one, but taken by Anh so the angle is better.

——————————————–

5d Postop – December 4, 2007

4th Morning Front

Front View (All thats changed except for healing for these series is I took off the swab below my nose – better view of the lip that way)

 4th Morning Nose

Better view of bottom nose, lip and neck area (I’m surprised there’s less swelling/bruising/pain now that my Adams’s apple is basically no more!)

4th Morning Profile

Side view – because of the way I have my hair, and the fact that my chin dressing is still on and swollen, and I have a cast on my nose, its hard to tell anything except the browline is lower and the brow ridge is gone. 

———————————

6d Postop – December 5, 2007

5th Day Front 

Front View – Chin and Nose Packing Removed

5 Days Postop Profile

——————————

7d Postop – December 6, 2007

6th Day Front

6th Day Profile Left 

 6th Day Profile Right

—————————————- 

8d Postop – December 7, 2007 

This next series was all taken by Tatiana at Dr. O’s office as part of the official before/after comp. I’ve included SBS shots here, since this is the first time you can compare “Apples to Apples” (athough Damn! Where’s my Adam’s Apple!) because all of the “stuff” has been removed. Not though that I still have a LOT of swelling and bruises in some places (and I hadn’t shaved yet on the day these were taken at about 1030am, and I had this lovely little walrus patch under my chin that I couldn’t shave for risk of making it impossible to remove some sutures. Mira said that we would “See” my new face on/about April 1. That will be an interesting comparison.

 Day 7 - Front and Free Headshot Straight On

Profile View Day 7 Preop Profile R

 Profile View Day 7 Left Side Preop Profile L

—————————————— 

9d Postop – December 8, 2007

 Me - Happy

Me, 10pm, on one of the happiest days of my life. I’m not perfect, I’m still a work in progress (as we all are), but I’m damn happy. I was tired as all get out when this pic was taken. And I’m not standing up straight Thats our Christmas tree – crazy rainbow angel and all (I’ve had it since I was 5 or so, and I had to replace the lights last year – I wish I could make it blink. And yes, thats the Space Needle on the right in the background. Thanks Adrian for taking this picture that I love.

——————————————– 

11d Postop – December 10, 2007

 Ok, I really liked the SBS thing, so I’m going to do it again. These are all from today. The one on the left is w/makeup  (see today’s post for info on THAT) at about 1pm, the one on the left is w/o. I know, these are different shots. But, interesting to compare. I still think I look “Jowly” because of the swelling, and I thought that while the makeup achieved the goal (passport shot w/o visible bruising or ‘stache), I took it off right after cuz it didn’t feel like me. And, it was 2 foot good (for photos), not 6 inches good (for Anh and Samwich). Photos done – makeup done. Interestingly tomorrow – DOL – new license – no makeup (my choice).

I’m definately not lipstick.

12/10 Front Makeup12/10 Front

12/10 Profile Makeup12/10 Profile

12/10 Profile Makeup12/10 Profile

Two things – very tired on the right. Also, experimenting w/portrait v.landscape. Thoughts?

Note all this is 11d postop. Not Bad! Thanks Dr. O & Team!

——————-

13d postop – December 12, 2007

I feel much better – only the nose “hurts”. Some nerves wake up and occasionally give me a hard time, but overall, I’m feeling good. That being said, I *know* that I have a long way to go.

Stuff I need to do at this point: eyebrows (noted in comment below), finish hair removal, esp in top/lower lip area (dark ones). (These dudes just all of a sudden came back w/a vengence! doesn’t help that I took the pic at 8pm tonight and hadn’t shaved since the AM, but whatever). Can’t restart electrolysis till March, but I can do Laser again (and will, next Fri – earliest I could get!), which will get the black baddies.

Stuff my body needs to do: all up swelling and slight bruising reduction, esp on “jowls”, and lots in the nose, grow more head hair (and less face hair)

With that, here’s today’s series.

12/12 Front

12/12 Profile Left

12/12 Profile Right

———————————

15d Postop, December 14, 2007

I’m feeling much much better. I have been able to sleep on the side of my head for two nights now (ears issue). My nose still hurts, but can take some pressure, and the bruising is getting significantly better. Chin area still super numb…

As far as my face appearance goes… swelling is down, and if I cover the ‘stache, I almost pass.

Note that I end up taking all of these pics at night, 12h post shaving. I do this “on purpose” to show “worst case” – tired, beard, etc.

NB I have laser next Friday – a week post that it should get much much better.

Special pic of the end of the series. Enjoy.

12/14 Front

12/14 Profile Left

12/14 Profile Right

Ok, this is a “special” one.

12/14 Judgy Judgy Poo Poo

Here’s the joke. When our “circle” of friends is overly judgemental, I started saying “Dont’ be so ‘Judgy Judgy Poo Poo’!”. This took off, somewhat, and was picked up a bit by the group. I want to do t-shirts w/”Judgy Boy” – which looks like Bob’s Big Boy, but doing the above. I am having a hard time selling this. So, here’s me modeling “Judgy Boy”. (Judgy Girl – whatever!)

———————-

17d Postop – December 16, 2007

These pictures, unlike the last few were taken in the morning, not the evening – not a ton of difference with the crazy mustache. Over the past couple of days, the bruising as improved considerably, as well as the jaw swelling. Best results so far – brow, ears, trachea. The hairline – I’m wait and see. The nose, jaw and chin – swelling really prevents any sort of call at this point. Laser Friday….

12/16 Front

12/16 Profile Left

12/16 Profile Right

————————————————

20d Postop – December 19, 2007

Two big things from a healing POV today. First off, the bruising is basically all gone. Secondly, I’ve gotten a little infection over my left ear. I go on antibiotics. :(. Overall, this is amazing that I’ve had so few complications. Two days till the mighty zapping of the ‘stache.

12/19 Front

12/19 Profile Left

12/19 Profile Right

 ——————————————–

27d Postop – December 26, 2007

I haven’t posted pictures for nearly a week because a) not a lot of change and b) I had laser last friday, and I kind of looked like crap.

However, two new things today, except for being a week later – new haircut, and also, some eyebrow tweezing. I also have included a bonus picture that excludes my crazy stache….

12/26 Front

12/26 Profile Left

12/26 Profile Right

12/26 Front Crop

—————————————————

33d Postop – January 1, 2008

Welcome to 2008! This picture series is again taken at night. A few things here – the stache seems way less pronounced, and the swelling seems to be down in my nose. However, I still have the jowly issues w/chin swelling. I am going to attempt to go running in the morning – first day back to work.

1/1 Front

1/1 Profile Left

1/1 Profile Right

———————————-

35d Postop – January 3, 2008

Me at work.

At Work, January 3, 2008

————————————

44d Postop – January 12, 2008

Here’s another triple series with a bonus picture. Tomorrow I’m planning on getting earrings, as well as a brow wax – its time! The ‘stache is basically gone, although there is a background shadow still. The other parts of my face are a little dark, but not super bad. My chin/jaw swelling seems way down….

1/12 Front

1/12 Profile Left

1/12 Profile Right

Bonus Picture – casual Saturday at home!

1/12 Full

—————————-

45d Postop – January 13, 2008

Basically, same as yesterday, but I had my eyebrows waxed and ears pierced (fake CZ).

1/13 Front

——————————————-

61d Postop – January 29, 2008 – Two Months!

Here we are, two months in….

January 29, 2008December 26, 2007November 30, 2007November 19, 2007

I included the one month, one day, and -10 day pictures for reference.

——————————————–

February 3, 2008 – Superbowl

Superbowl ManiHand Close Up

All for Naught!

———————————————–

February 12, 2008 – My 39th Birthday – At My Desk (10 weeks, 5 days since FFS)

Birthday Girl!

Birthday Girl!

Both taken with my cellphone cam, sorry for the quality!

————————————————————–

February 17, 2008 (11 weeks, 3 days from FFS) – Paris

Boat TripMe in Paris

——————————————————

February 19, 2008 (11 weeks, 5 days from FFS) – Paris – Musee D’Orsay

Big Baby

—————————————————————

March 1, 2008 – (13 weeks, 2 days from FFS)

Me at TRE

Blurry

More TRE

—————————————

March 22, 2008 (16 weeks, 2 days from FFS)

March 22, 2008

March 22, 2008

March 22, 2008

New Hair (well, not that new)

—————————————–

DisneyWorld, April 2008

DisneyWorld, April 2008

——————————————
Me at MMS, Blue Shirt and All

Me at MMS, Blue Shirt and All

May 1, 2008

—————————————

Me at Work

Me at Work

May 13, 2008

———————————

My and the top of Samwich's Head

My and the top of Samwich's Head

August 15, 2008

————————————–

Me, August 2008

Hawaii

 

Hawaii with Hat

Hawaii with Hat

August, 2008

————————————

Barcelona!

Barcelona!

November, 2008

——————————-

December 7, 2008

December 7, 2008

December 7, 2008

December 7, 2008

December 7, 2008

December 7, 2008

About one year FFS.

55 Comments »

  1. Mad said,

    Hey, when are you going to change your email address lady? I was looking for Megan Wallent in the address book at MSFT and couldn’t find it.

  2. Prudy said,

    Megan, it’s wonderful to read and to see you are doing so great.. Congratulations!

    Will see you soon…
    Best,
    Prudy

  3. Debra & Ramona said,

    Hi…we just got back from vacation and got your message. Unfortunately I have to go to Strat Conference tomorrow or I would so be dragging you out for cocktails…supposedly speeds the healing process…but will see you this week. Keep taking care of you until then…and eat…good for the womanly figure!

    xox

    Debra

  4. Marj said,

    please get your eyebrows waxed

    Megan>> you must come from the steveb school of writing email no caps no punc just the facts i get it i like that email form too note that my face is in a state of dramatic flux and if incurred more injury/pain i would likely decide to choose the choice that i give the kids when bitching about a minor pain “amputation” that would likely lead to an unfavorable surgical outcome and dr o would not appreciate it believe me though its on the schedule as soon as it could be tolerated by my well trod upon noggin
    :)

  5. Joseo said,

    Have you considered a brief period in a tanning bed? Or better yet, go to Hawaii for a week. :)

    A slight bit of sun-tone to the skin will help immensely with reducing the contrast between your darker facial hairs and your skin.

    Don’t go George Hamilton or anything like that, just a little warm tan.

    Megan >> We do love Hawaii. Hmm…

    Here’s the problem, laser works best with contrast. This is why laser has worked so well removing my dark facial hairs. My beard was 60/40 dark/white, and laser removed ZERO of he white ones (as I was told it woudln’t – not surprised). Had to electrolysis-alize the white ones – thats a process.

    But, with either laser or electrolysis, its a process of killing/breaking down either the stem cells (laser) or the blood supply (electrolysis). So, courser hairs take longer. Much longer for some, because they have more “stuff” to make em grow that you need to get rid of.

    So… tanning is a FANTASTIC idea – but I need to wait till laser has done all it can do. I’m really hoping that a quick laser next week on the lip area, and a week later – viola! NB that in that intervening week, the hairs will look darker…

    It’s a process…. a maddening one, but a process.

  6. marj said,

    please remember that it is not a good idea to tan or expose recently operated skin to the sun for one year
    please consider mystic tan
    or airbrushing

  7. Dave said,

    Your life is a really sad story and it is unfortunate that you did not get the type of medical help you needed. Play up your sickness all you want, but this can not come to any good for your wife and children. I don’t say any of this t be mean, but you have taken the hand you were dealt and acted selfishly. You are just ill and I feel very pained for you and your family.

    Megan >> I thought for a long while about what do with this comment. However, since my blog is all about being open and honest, I’ve decided to post it. However, I will be posting shortly a long reply. Not a rant, but a reply.

  8. MarkyMark said,

    Megan,
    I would not even respond to the above blog [ed. I think you mean “comment”] it is just one persons opion who has a very narrow and ignorant out look on life. It does not even warrent your time or effort and I would bet after reading it and thinking about it he must be hiding something…

    Megan>> Thanks Mark… sometimes when I read stuff like the Dave or Dave2 comment, I feel almost compelled to respond – not just for me but for “the record”. See the other comment by Carol who is also TG….

    Happy new year!

    – Megan

  9. Phillip said,

    Thanks for the blog, I am finding it fascinating. You are a very brave woman.

    Megan >> Thanks Phillip! I appreciate the kind words, and am glad that you find it interesting.

  10. MG said,

    Megan,

    I’ve stumbled onto your blog, and while I am undoubtedly uncomfortable while reading, I am nonetheless appalled at Dave’s comment. Your courage is impressive, and I hope that others, esp. those who need to hear/read more trans voices, appreciate your efforts to make this experience public. Just because we don’t understand another individual’s motivations does not give us license to judge.

    I wish you success — as YOU define it, not how others may perceive it — on your journey.

    Megan>> Thanks for the note of support, and I appreciate the kind words… I do hope that others simply see this as the point of view of one person, with strengths, weaknesses, and room to grow! I certainly wouldn’t *encourage* anyone to do anything but be themselves!

  11. loverly said,

    I am impressed by your honesty about your transition (even more so by the obvious support of those who are closest to you).

    One of my closest friends is trans-gendered. I have worked with him/her her/him (whatever) to develop a makeup style that works. I thought I might share the very simple basics with you. Hope you are not offended.

    You look great, but I would suggest a lip-plumping gloss (that is, if you don’t want to use just a teensy bit of restylin or juvederm to give your lips some more definition), some bronzer (Bonnie Bell makes the best, cheap as their products are) mixed with a very light cheek stain, plucking your brows so that they have a tiny bit of an arch, and working on holding your shoulders and head back, rather than pushing ur head forward. I am pretty sure posture is key to what you want to achieve.

    Best of luck to you and your family in this new year and for years to come. I hope I am not being presumptuous by saying these things, but you did post on the interube for all to see.

    I support you in your decision, by the way, which, from experience, I know to be a difficult one.

    Megan>> I really do appreciate the feedback… I’m still learning some of the basics, and this stuff makes a ton of sense!

    On the makeup side… well, I guess I need to really either decide that I’m not going to use it at all – or get used to a little. I’m still in the middle there. I don’t want to be “painted” and feel artificial, but I want to look natural and nice!

    I am going to get earrings – probably weekend after next… that should help too!

    As for the brows, Anh’s brother James just did them. He’s a professional stylist, and his feedback was that the brow ends aren’t defined enough to really make an arch right away – that it will be more gradual. The other problem honestly, is that I have weird nerve issues (no feeling, lots of feeling, cold/hot/pain sensitivity) in that area that makes plucking somewhat painful (I know, after all this – plucking is super painful – odd).

    There’s a slippery slope here that I don’t want to go down in which I spend a lot of time/focus worrying/acting on how I look. Thats not how I roll, or how I want to! I want to look good, but I don’t want to focus on it.

    Anyway… I do appreciate the comment, and it was totally in-bounds!

    Happy New Year to you and yours as well!

    – Megan

  12. loverly said,

    I totally understand. I am one of the least girly-girl I know, but I do like a bit of a glow on the cheek and a bit of arch to the brow. It makes a world of difference in how I am treated (even as a genetic female). Done properly, no one notices it at all.

    You might look into Smashbox’ Photofinish line. I only use the clear primer, but it makes your skin look great, as if you have no pores at all and no plucked or shaved hairs (and I have to pluck my own dark hairs on my chin and lip every other day, so I should know). Every guy I know who has tried it loves it and even my 74 year old mum who hates makeup thinks it rocks (doesn’t look like makeup at all and only takes a second to apply).

    Don’t want to sound like a promoter for products, but your colouring is so similar to mine that I think the ones I have mentioned would work for you.

    My less-than-five minute morning routine is this (after showering/washing face and nasty bits) of course:

    Smashbox Photofinish (all over face and down the neck

    Mix of Bonnie Bell bronzer in dark or medium with cheek stain in pink on apples of cheek up into hairline (light application that lasts all day)

    Apply same mix (whatever is left over to lips and let dry

    Apply clear lip gloss (plumping or not, but I like the tingly plumping ones most of all).

    On bad days, I might add mascara and a teensy bit of undereye brightener/cover if need be.

    You look beautiful in your work photo, by the way. Very natural and happy.

    Hope you don’t think my comments out of line.

    Megan >> No, totally not out of line! I love the comments!

    I do like the step by step instructions… might be a fun Saturday project at some point!

    thanks much for the kind comments about my work picture! Today was a very happy day (again!)

  13. peter parker said,

    Darling…nice tits! And bravo for being who you really are rather than living a lie to please the narrow-minded, ignorant asses (ie: Dave) of this world!

    Much love and much happiness to you!

    xo,
    peterparker

  14. Jon. said,

    I just wanted to leave you a note to express how touching I’ve found your blog to be. Not that I can begin to grasp the bravery you exhibit, but I hope someday everyone can. Congratulations on being yourself :)

    Megan>> Well, thanks a bunch Jon… I do hope everyone can just be them, no matter what that means. That might be pretty interesting, huh?

  15. James said,

    I’m sure none of this has been particularly easy, but I admire you for taking everything in stride. A lot of people would benefit from your attitude when addressing some of the much smaller things they want to change about their own lives and their own relationships to the world. Awesome blog, too :)

    Megan>> Thanks James! Glad you like the blog!

  16. Chris said,

    Dear Megan, and I do mean Dear. I have been reading your blog for the last hour plus this morning, and at points it has brought me to near tears. More so, because I feel fear for what your kids are going thru. The fear of loosing their “dad” and what all that means to them. I have not gone thru any of this in my own life, but I am a very epathic person and even in this digital medium, I feel the pain that your son expressed about wanting to find a “cure” for you. I have never thought about what my own issues are, and there are a lot, but I love to read about, or see movies, or shows, about people who have overcome the obsticals in their lives and live happy and fulfilled lives. It gives me hope that one day, someday, I too will find that spot and realize it was all worth it. I just wanted to let you know, that your story is inspiring, lovely, and true. Take care of yourself, your family, and tell the nay-sayers to go fly a kite. Love from MN, Chris.

    Megan>> Hi Chris – its really interesting to see how the kids are doing – but really, its become a non-issue for them over the past few weeks. There is no doubt that this has been hard for them, but as the adults in their lives have dealt with this in a very accepting way, the same has applied to them. Also, the communities that they live in have been very accepting, which has made this easier as well….

    I’m glad that you found something in my space that you can apply to you – thats a huge compliment!

    Best of luck to you as well, and thanks for reading!

    – Megan

  17. Jeff said,

    Megan: Wanted to let you know that we’ve just featured your blog on BlogAwards.com. Congrats!

    Megan>> thanks! glad you liked the blog! and thanks for the award!

  18. xarcadia said,

    What an exceptional journey you have been on. Congratulations on your strength and courage to take the steps necessary to be happy. It certainly helps to put my life into perspective, and I appreciate that. I wish you the very best – and not that you weren’t cute before, but I love that picture of you in your office, you look beautiful.

    Megan>> Well thanks! I really appreciate the kind words!

  19. Cristof said,

    Hi Megan. Thanks for sharing your (ongoing) path! We worked together very briefly on Trident (I was an STE) and remember you very fondly.

    I had a similar path on the name, where I fully changed my name midway while working at MSFT. MSFT was probably the easiest part of it; my lead just asked the name I preferred, and went ahead and changed nameplates and aliases and all, and that was that. The DOL was pretty easy and the SSA was too surprisingly. Family and friends were a different aspect; it’s 12 years now, and I still have to go by my previous name (Will) to them. Kind of leads to a multiple-lives-in-one, which is really cool that you’re not experiencing.

    I was briefly friends with a non-GG that worked in Expedia as a PM around 1997. Unfortunately I don’t remember her name, but have been trying for a long while. Perhaps you could connect as a friendly folk?

    Looking forward to following your story. Wishing you much strength and joy.

  20. Sara said,

    Found your blog via Microspotting — it’s fascinating. Best of luck in the rest of this journey, you’ve come such a long way with grace! <3

  21. Daniel said,

    Hey, greetings from across the pond. I found your blog quite by accident; but I just wanted to say that your courage and tenacity is remarkable. It’s also wonderful that you have so many supportive family, friends and colleagues.

    Your commenter, Dave (21/12/07) above, ought to brush up on his children’s stories – one of my old favourites has a pearl of wisdom that many of us would do well to remember a little more often….

    “…It is only with the heart that one can see rightly, what’s essential is invisible to the eye…”

    Antoine D’Saint Exupery (The Little Prince)

    Good luck with your journey. I shall pop by here from time to time and see how things are.

    Regards, Daniel

  22. Meghan said,

    Megan

    You are currently visiting one of my favorite cities ( Paris ), I am a UK ex-pat transplant here in Texas. Transitioned last year within a high-tech software company. I’d like to keep in touch with you and will stop by your blog to read about your adventures in life.

    enjoy !

    ~ Meghan

  23. Mac McLean said,

    Just read your blog, it was very interesting and eye opening. Doing what’s right for you is often not an easy thing to do. I respect your right to choose your path and admire you for the courage it took to do it. Good luck.

  24. jennywocky said,

    Hi hon,

    I was thrilled to see your story covered on the front page of ABCNews.com today. I haven’t read your blog yet, just the story there, and skimmed over your opening page — but I’m proud of you for having courage to take the steps you needed to take.

    (And at some level, I know it probably is not even courage, it’s just that you feel like you need to do it or die… and people do what they have to in order to survive. That’s all.)

    About the same age, just not as far on the road as you are, but it’s encouraging for me to see how well you have done so far. There’s a lot of anxieties in transitioning, so it’s nice to see that not all the fears are justified… that there’s just as much chance for some positive outcome as negative.

    *hug*

    ~ Jennifer

  25. anonymous said,

    You state you are open to questions and I have a few. I don’t mean to offend, I am curious and you stated you were open to others questions.

    1. Have you been addicted to porn? If you view porn (now or in the past), did you view transgender porn? What other types of porn did you view?

    2. If you feel your supposed to be a woman why are you attracted to women and why are you keeping your penis? Women (as you know) don’t have a penis are typically are attracted to men. Do you feel you should be a woman or just look and act like a woman?

    3. If you didn’t have the money for surgeries would you pursue being transgendered?

    4. Why did it take 38 years for this to happen? If you didn’t know you were meant to be a women until recent, how do you still know you are supposed to be a women?

    5. Did you see a psycologist or counselor at any point before your operation to see if they had suggestions as to what was missing in your life?

    6. Are you a religious person? Spiritual?

    7. Are you happier now than you were 1 year ago?

    8. Has this tranformation left an overall improvement to your life? Were things overall better before ‘coming out’?

    9. Were you every abused as a child? Any mental illness?

    These are honest questions that aren’t meant to offend or harm. I’m curious to know how a person could think this was a wise decision. They are honest questions, blunt, and embaressing. You may not feel comfortable answering many or all of these. But if you wouldn’t mind, answer what you feel comfortable answering, and I will check back in a few days. Thanks-

    Megan>> Blunt and to the point. In order.

    1. a) No. b & c) n/a

    2. In the (paraphrased) words of cookie monster “Me think you have fundamental misconception of gender identity, attraction, and private parts”. If you consider all of these things as independent (which I do, at least for me, although I know its not a common feeling), then it makes more sense. If you argue that to be a woman you must be attracted to men, what does that mean for all the lesbians in the world? Are they really trans-men? I don’t think they would say that.

    3. Again, a verbage problem. I have GID (gender identity disorder) (as an aside, some people post transition, might say “had” because once they transition, then they no longer have the schism related to how they feel vs. how they present – count me in as “had”, although at only +3 months, I hesitate to be so bold).

    If you are asking if I would still transition if I didn’t have the money to afford things like hair removal or facial surgery, thats a harder question. I think it would have taken longer, been harder in the middle, and not have been as easy at the end. I still would have been on a journey to be myself, but its so hard to say how that path would have been different.

    But, the answer to the question, if it requires a yes or no answer, is “Yes”.

    4. a) It took me 38 years to get here because I needed 38 years to really get to know myself, and be strong enough to take the risk to do something that was at once true to myself, but at odds with the societal norm.
    b) I know I did the right thing because the constant nagging din in my noggin that was there for so long is just gone. I am at peace with who I am.

    5. Yes, I was in therapy for a while before deciding to come out, and it took longer to decide (along with Anh’s loving support) to transition. Of course, of course we talked through all the options…

    6. a) I’m an atheist/pastafarian. (see the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster on wikipedia). b) Spiritual – yes! I’m in awe of the universe, this world, everything and everything on it. While not being a believer in a divine being, that does not make me not spiritual or morally grounded.

    7. Absolutely. No doubt.

    8. a) Improvement in my life, yes. Has the journey been a challenge, absolutely, but I feel like a better person for it. b) No, things were not better before coming out. I was constantly facing internal questions as to who I was, and was unable to face it.

    9. No, not abused. My parents and family were and are fantastic, loving people.

    I don’t take offense at all… I may not agree with some of the assumptions buried in the questions, but I appreciate the candor.

    Respectfully,

    – Megan

  26. Melissa said,

    Congratulations, Megan! You look fantastic. I wish you and your wife all the best. Come to think of it, does your wife have a blog detailing all that she is going through? I think it would help other wives/spouses going through this. We need to hear her voice, too.
    Cheers!

    Megan>> Anh does not have a blog, she’s pretty private… the interview was the first time that she talked about this publicly, and not through me and the blog…. I know, she does have a lot to say! And, she’s amazing!

  27. Octavio Hernandez said,

    Megan,

    You have my respect and admiration. How many people have the courage and fortitude to break free from the chains that tie them down? Life is short; happiness and love are rare. Will be watchig Nighline tonight. Best wishes to you,

    Octavio

  28. Willy said,

    Megan,
    No one really understands what you went through in your life unless they have lived it. I also never felt like a male. Marriage, kids, great career, devasting depression. The result–divorce, anxiety, more depression. Coming out as gay didn’t solve the problem either. That didn’t fit my feelings about myself. So I am sliding into my 60’s without feeling true to myself. Needless to say that I admire you courrage and strength to seek happiness. God bless

  29. Suzanne said,

    Hi Megan,
    You look radiant! I picked up the link to your story from a small listserv of friends and wanted to take the opportunity to put out a broader perspective for not only you but other readers. Although biology divides us physiologically into male and female, gender is far more than that. Our culture is very concrete and thus sanctions only two genders, corresponding to genitalia. However, there were a number of Native American cultures that recognized as many as five distinct genders and provided socially sanctioned roles for each gender.

    I would differ strongly with those who believe you are doing your children a disservice. You have given your children a gift – you’ve expanded their worldview, provided them with a non-polarized vision of the breadth of what it means to be human. The world needs more people like you, and like the people your children will have the opportunity to be.

    Thank you for having the courage to be your authentic self in this troubled world.
    wishing you (and your family) peace and joy,
    Suzanne

    Megan>> Sniff…. wow… what a super nice comment. After all the craziness today, this was sweet and unexpected. thanks so much!

    – Megan

  30. Rayshaun said,

    Its nothing wrong with change just back it up 100%

  31. Shannon Ware said,

    Good for you sister! It’s a shame this is even news anymore, should be just life. Went through it myself almost ten years ago:

    http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,988748-1,00.html

    Just lead by example, as you have been doing!

  32. Vivian said,

    God create you the way he wanted you to be, and that was to be a male. If he wanted you to be a female he would have made you that way. You need to repent and as god to forgive you for what you have done because it isn’t right in God’s eyes. He created man in his own image, he created male and female. He made male to be with female, not for female to be with female, and not for male to be with male, because they cannot be fruitful and multiply. He said to be fruitful, and multiply. I really feel sad for you and will pray for you. It’s not right and I am not judging. You said that you always felt like you were in the wrong body, that was and is the work of the enemies, which is satan who works in the mind if you let him. I pray for your family.

    Megan>>

    To all my readers: I approved this comment for a couple of reasons:
    a) Its not vituperative
    b) I approve virtally all comments (I’ve only blocked one, a few months ago, it was just out of line)
    c) Even though you (me) might not agree with Vivian, I support her rights to free speech, even here in my space.

    To Vivian –
    First off, I respect your right to have your own beliefs, and appreciate that fact that you commented here in a way that while I disagree with, wasn’t about a personal attack.

    Secondly, understand that I am an atheist, and I’ve been pretty clear about that. So, I don’t believe that any being, knowing or otherwise created me, you, the flowers, the trees, the bees, etc. I don’t believe that I need to ask anyone for forgiveness except those on this earth who I may not treat as well as I should – there are certainly people who I feel that I have wronged, and I have tried to accept that, learn from that, apologize to them, and move on.

    I appreciate your kind thoughts for me and my family, and certainly wish you the best.

    Respectfully,

    Megan

  33. Catherine said,

    Megan,

    I just watched your story tonight on ABC. You look so very happy and content to be your authentic self. What a HUGE relief for you! Your story shows a beautiful person on the inside and now you have become the person on the outside that matches what you feel that is your true self. I didn’t really see your story to be just about Transgender but more about the underlying message to BE YOUR AUTHENTIC SELF, with passion and honesty to be truly happy in this life. You and Anne are incredibly brave! Anne is an amazing woman who obviously married you for the loving person that you are. You will change the lives of many by sharing your story.

    My best to you,

    Catherine

  34. Clara Ann said,

    Dear Megan,

    I just caught the end of Nightline last night, so I did not get your complete story until finding the link to your BLOG this morning. I congratulate you on becoming the woman that you were meant to be.

    I have known since I was five years old that I should have been a girl. I prayed every night to wake up the next morning as a girl. I had been taught that if you prayed for something, God would give it to you. Somebody was lying!

    That was 56 years ago. I grew up with guilt and the humiliation that I must be very weird. People would talk about “gays” but never had I heard about my condition until I was 45, married and the father of three daughters. I have missed out on knowing the female person that I should have been!

    I wish you long life and happiness as you discover the new woman you have become!

    Clara Ann

  35. Nevin said,

    Well .. I heared the news & kept thinking of u all night …. u know human’s Curiosity, did u change everything related to your past manhood??? I only understood that u changed your face & breasts .. what about the rest of your body???
    & why would u go in to all that pain just to change your outside figure since u were not & WILL NOT be attracted to men .. or would u someday ????
    When u sit by your self now .. close your eyes .. do u feel u r a woman ??? & do u only think of a woman as a pretty feminen face with boobs ???
    I’m really not sure how did u think of women before changing your self to one … its kinda crazy but I can’t help my self to stop thinking of u …
    I can see a lot of people supporting u .. ok what u have done is done .. & its up to u .. .everyone is responsible for his deeds .. & u ladies saying your recommendations & makeup tricks .. just convincing your selves that u r open minded people .. & that u r helping Megan to be prettier ……. Its really crazy …
    I’m not sure how will your life end … will your wife or PARTNER remain with u forever ??? & if not .. are u gonna have a male partner or a female one !
    I have no right to judge u .. & I’m sorry if it feels like .. but .. nothing is right here at all , if u already had a medical problem .. & u were a bisexual or not a complete man as u were it wouldn’t have been a problem at all .. but u were a NORMAL man .. a complete fertile normal man & not even a gay .. so why ???????????
    I’m sorry .. but I couldn’t help it

    Megan>> I can’t go through this all line by line, but I think in the FAQ and in other places I’ve been pretty clear on my surgical status, and nothing about that has changed.

    As for the folks w/tips on looking better, I guess I disagree… I LOVE the comments on that. It shows a level of caring and engagement that I really appreciate.

    As for Anh and me, we are together, and I love her very much. I plan on being with her till we are dust. Nuff said.

    As for why transition if you aren’t either “going all the way” or be attracted to men, well, I don’t think that either one of these defines an experience. Like Neal (the reporter) asked me “What Gender are you” – I said, “I’m me”. Thats good enough for me, and I’m eminently comfortable where I am today….

    hope that helps to clarify things….

    • Herby Sagues said,

      I’m with Nevin on this one. Isn’t this all a bit superficial? Are looks so important to make your whole life revolve around them?
      I mean, if a woman gets a boob job, I think that is quite superficial but maybe reasonable if it doesn’t cost her much. But if someone has to really change his whole life just to accomodate changes to look as he/she wanted, that’s way too much focus on appearance. It is like those people that go to extreme body modifications with tatoos, piercings and inserts. It is fine with me if they want to do that, its their lifes, but it is still extremely superficial that someone would go to such extremes just for looks.

      Megan>> Two thoughts. Transitioning isn’t superficial or about how you look – its how you relate to the world, and how you ask the world to see you. Some may disagree about that. Secondly, if you are going to transition, IMHO – do it well. Its hard enough as it is – if there are things that you can do to make acceptance in the world a little more seamless, then thats really the point. Is that a societal issue that people would judge you for how you look – absolutely! But… thats the world. If I just wanted to have long hair and wear dresses, then I wouldn’t have transitioned! (and I don’t wear dresses….)

  36. Tiana said,

    Hi Megan,

    First let me congratulate you on taking the next steps to being your true self. I am in a very similar situation, and have gone through each of my self-acceptance steps a little at a time. But knowing that others such as yourself are out there open to the world to show that we are just people who want to live our lives authentic is so appreciated. I hope that your coming-out can shed more positive light on what it is to be transgender or transsexual.

    I also would like to commend you on your responses to some of the misconceptions posted. I would like to expand on one thing – that gender identity (how we mentally perceive our gender) and sexual preference (who we are attracted to) are two separate things. Just as if a woman or a man can be gay/lesbian or bisexual, so can transgender individuals. The difference is how our minds perceive ourselves as male or female, or perhaps even some of both. It is not just one or the other, as there can be a blend of genders in all of us. If it sounds confusing, well, it can be, especially for those of us who experience the gender conflict. I myself could not understand when I was younger why I felt I was a girl/woman when I was only attracted to girls/women. I believed the misconception that if I wanted to be a girl then I should like men. That confusion was one reason I denied and repressed being transgendered for many years. But eventually I HAD to face it since it started to impact my day-to-day life (loss of concentration and depression).

    I would like to also offer some type of description to those who do not understand gender dysphoria. Think about wearing a shirt that is on backwards, or perhaps wearing shoes that are on the wrong feet, where you cannot easily change them. It can be uncomfortable some of the time, then grow to be more uncomfortable to the point where it just bugs you so much that you cannot live with it anymore. Think of taking proper methods of changing the shirt or shoes the same as making the necessary physical changes through hormones and surgery. This is probably my best way of describing it. Hopefully this helps create some understanding.

    Thanks, Tiana :)

  37. Jenny Caden said,

    Hi Megan,
    Congratulations on your transition! I did do almost 8 months ago and so far things have gone quite well except for the layoff (not gender related) a month ago. I know I am happier now that I was before (lots of depression before). I have 2 kids (19 & 22) who are ok with me (I had custody of both after the divorce) and I could care less about my ex-.
    I think you are lucky to get your driver’s licence changed, because in Ohio, that can only be changed by furnishing proof of having undergone GRS. For me, that is something in the future.
    I have known Dr. O for a number of years. He is excellent although I can’t afford his services. I would say you are proof of that – you look great! If you see them again, tell Mira and Doug I said Hi.
    For some reason I am getting to be very “out” in the area and education a lot of folks in the process. I know it is key to understanding and it has been an experience so far! I think that is a big part of why my experience at work went so well, not to mention having support from corporate brass, including the company Sr. VP of HR.
    Thanks again for sharing and good luck!
    Jenny

  38. Karen said,

    I guess in the end, people realize that when you care about someone (you) that is all that matters….As you said, you are you! It was wonderful to hear the support you received from your colleagues…they certainly really care about you. And by the way, you have a really nice smile! Wishing you well.

  39. Katie said,

    Hey Megan, I’ve read your blog for about the past two months or so, and I’d just like to say that it’s awesome what you’ve done, and I also can’t tell you we’re originally a man! I do have a question, though, are there still people that mistake you for a man? I didn’t know you had a Nightline special, though, and I missed it! Darn.

    Katie

    P.S. I love “1234” by Feist as well! Go Samwich!

    Megan>> Well, thank you! And yes, I do get sir’red a bit still, but not as much. The link to the ABC bit is on the blog, a couple of posts down…

    Samwich still does dance to that song – EVERY TIME! Hopefully he won’t become a Feist-stalker… :)

  40. miranda said,

    megan… i found your blog through abcnews.com and while i woudlnt normally send random emails to a stranger.. i wanted to say that i think its awesome that you followed your heart and went through your transition. we’re all our own people, and those of us with the courage to be ourselves will be the ones that are happy in the end. if youre ever in northern cali, say hi and i’d love to do a photo shoot with you. ~miranda

    “wherever you go, you can never leave yourself behind” – polish proverb

  41. Bob said,

    Hi Megan,

    My family and i look forward to your new postings. More pix please. We first original saw you on the news and was curious to understand… You transformed our curiosity into understanding about our fellow human beings and through this, we have been able to share with our children about loving people, accepting and celebrating people. We have all become better people for learning to be more understanding, more compassionate, less fearful of things we don’t know.

    Thank you for this beautiful human story. You are a good writer, honest, and more than fair. We appreciate you giving people a forum to share what they feel even if they don’t support what you chose. I respect someone who is open-minded and allow others to express their opinions even if it contrary to yours. That’s a person of character.

    Our family wish you and your family love, true happiness, peace, continued success and laughter, lots of laughter.

    We enjoy hearing your story and the progress. We are so proud of our kids for truly wanting to hear about your family and not out of curiousity but more about the details about people they care about.

    If we can learn to love like these kids, our world would be a better place. We are all better for having learned about your life and story. Continue on this path of recovery and best wishes for all your endeavors.

    Affectionately, from our family to your family.

  42. Rebecca said,

    Hi Megan-
    I found your blog through the ABC website on your story. I am truly in awe of your strength and openness. I know that being tg is a very hard decision and that you could not have come to your decision easily. Your openness about your tg status as well as your position in Microsoft is an enormous boost to the tg community as a whole. Your ability to ‘life life’ as it may be and be yourself is a wonderful counter to the common misconceptions about tg people. Please keep us updated on your progress, your struggles, and your victories. I wish you and your family all the best.

  43. Jennifer Shepherd said,

    Hi, Megan… just read about your story on MIcrospotting, and wanted to say “you go girl” and also that you look great! It’s cool seeing the progression of photos showing the transition. You definitely look masculine at the beginning and feminine at the end, but somehow without looking like a different person, so that’s very interesting. It must have been pretty thrilling as your outside began to more closely match your inner self-image.

    Props to your wife & family for supporting you in this, also. I can imagine it might not always be easy, as a change like this might involve self-image issues for them too.

    take care,

    –js

  44. karen said,

    Hi Megan, I grew up directly across the street from you. I think it is a wonderful thing what you are doing for yourself. Now you can be happy with who you are just the way it should be. Glad I had the opportunity to visit this site and share this with someone from my childhood. You really seem to be doing very well. Hope the years bring you great joy and happiness in your new life. All my best.
    Karen Murphy

  45. wendy said,

    Good for you!! I was just scanning through your blogs and the negative comments crack me up!! Why are they looking in this “area” in the first place?!! HA!! Really, you have to look for this, or even if you happen to come across it, you have to continue reading and then even comment?!!! If you were so repulsed, you should’ve closed it a long time ago. Find something better to do with your time… oh righteous ones!! God said this and God said that…. then put your face back in the bible and stay out of other peoples’ business!! (LOSERS)
    That’s all….

  46. Jeremy said,

    I have investigated the process of brow ridge reduction but . . . it seems like such a momumental process . . . that I am scared away. It also seems the entry point would be along the hairline . . . and since I have a strong M shape hairline . . . I’m not sure this would be hidden well.

    I have always hated my prominent brow . . . primarily the burs (best descriptive term I can come up with) on the far right and left of the brow bother me.

    Your result looks very nice.

  47. Ria said,

    Hi Megan,

    I first heard about you in June from someone I met on the east coast during a vacation trip. I am a transgender person and when I mentioned where I work, this person on the east coast told me she had seen a documentary on TV about a manager at MSFT who is transitioning. I found the video online and I discovered this website. It took me a few weeks go read everything you have written on this website and everything that other people have posted on your website. I am in awe of your courage to open your life to the world and I respect you for setting the right tone of discussion that can help other transgender people.

    Unlike your current situation, I am yet to come out at work and I am not totally out to my family either. I have known since I was 3 or 4 years old that I did not fit into the gender pigeonhole of society. Contrary to popular belief, my gender identity is unrelated to my sexual orientation or reproductive role, which are distinct concepts. Although I have lived as female in private since age 16 and I have lived most of my social life as female since age 22 (I am lucky to pass perfectly), I did not take any steps to transition until very recently. I focused my efforts on education, including two graduate degrees, career, sports, interests, volunteering, etc and on my loving family. I have also been active in supporting other LGBTQ people in the area and spreading awareness at universities. About half the people I know know me as female. I am 30 years old now and I am getting increasingly tired of having to pretend and live two lives.

    Last year, I had read an HR page about transitioning at work, but I did not know anyone who had done so. Besides, my manager was too conservative and I could not expect any support. Now I seem to have a more open-minded manager, but I am still afraid about the consequences of coming out at work, particularly reactions from peers especially some specific women my age and from the project teams that I lead. Besides, I have been with the company for several years and I do not know how to come out to the 1000 odd people at MSFT who know me (as male) very well. This is where your story gives me hope and some courage to be myself. I appreciate all your efforts in creating and maintaining this website.

    My best wishes to you and to your family!

    Ria

  48. Barbara said,

    Megan,

    I read your story and I am touched by your struggle but even more so by your victories and achievements. As a disable military individual, I know the daily struggle of just ‘being’ can sometimes be hard in a world that does not want to accept imperfections or differences in people. That, in itself, is too bad. For the world to truly change in the wonder it can be, people must accept all people, regardless of who and what they are. The world is made of the HUMAN race … such an amazing concept, isn’t it?

    It takes an amazing individual to take their personal story and journey and allow the world to enter it, much less make comment on it. The courage and bravery you have shown is etched forever in my mind and heart. If I never meet you or speak with you, I will forever remember you and keep you and your family in my prayers.

    Megan, may you and your family be forever blessed. May peace, love and happiness reign in your home and life now and always.

  49. Lita said,

    So I googled positive comments of co workers for a job assignment today and came across your blog.
    I find your story very interesting and admire you for making your life what you want it to be.
    I imagine you have been through alot.
    This is a reminder to those like that a** Dave above that you can be who you want to be. And those that have unconditional love will remain by your side.
    Congrats on fulfilling your life wishes!
    Maybe we should pray for people like Dave..they need it huh? :)

  50. Megan, I heard you speak at Out & Equal in Austin, TX, in September, and just wanted to comment. I’ve enjoyed going through archives and learning more about your journey, and I wanted to thank you for being so open and so brave and for helping us all feel that it’s ok to be who we are. It’s not easy, but your story underlines how important it is. Thank you! And all the luck in the world to you. I hope you’ll continue to post.

  51. Larissa said,

    I just wanted to let you know that I think you are absolutely beautiful, and an incredibly strong woman. <3

  52. Alexis said,

    Hey Megan!

    I actually googled purse tan (don’t ask…) and came across this. I can say after about 5-10 minutes of reading and looking at the pictures that you are one of my heros. I admire your courage to no end. As a bisexual, I come across people every day that don’t support/accept me, and even a girl that I considered my best friend never feels the same about me anymore, which always makes me sad. :/ But your story and your openness about this is so awe-inspiring. You are absolutely beautiful and such a strong woman. I’m so glad I came across this.

    Best of luck – and thank you,
    Alex

  53. Lavida Loca said,

    I would like to share your story on my blog Megan, it is very inspiring to me. I’ve read through some of the comments, and I am disappointed with some of the narrow minded and critical comments. It is for that very fact that makes it hard for people like us to come out in the first place.

    I am fascinated by your transformation. Its not something you see everyday :)
    The challenges you deal with on a daily basis… that alone simply demands respect from everyone else.

    Proud of you!

  54. BadWitch said,

    wow wow and wow again! Big ups on your bravery, your true heart and your self-esteem at every stage. I was searching for images for our blog and came on your wonderful journey. Blessings to you, my brave friend!

    http://GoodWitchBadWitch.cm


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

%d bloggers like this: